I think you must live under my bed.
Every night I feel you lurking.
Slowly…silently…your tentacles creep out. Even though your presence is but a whisper, I still sense you.
Like an octopus ensnaring its prey, your icy tentacled tendrils latch viciously around my curled body. Twisting tighter and tighter you sneak your way in.
A trespasser in the night.
Gently at my feet I feel the safety net of sleep softly lapping, but like an aggressive guard dog or a jealous boyfriend, you quickly chase her away.
My heart slams against my chest, each thud like a gun to the head, causing my eyes to stretch wide. I’ve studied this ceiling too many times.
Anxiety makes her grand debut. She descends from the silence ready to stir up the chaos frothing within. Not one to be late; she is right on cue.
Like a queen cascading down the grand staircase to the ball below, anxiety takes this castle as her own; as if she thinks I am hers to rule.
But you are the one who invited her here. You built the grand staircase and the ballroom she waltzed onto.
It is you who grabbed the one I need by the neck and threw her out into the cold.
It is you who threw a feast and invited your friends to come in.
And It is you holding me hostage in this bodily mutiny.
It is you, the trespasser in the night.
Give me escape from this decrepit castle. The outer walls may look deceivingly strong and stable, but within, it is a haunted horror house of madness.
Somehow you got in.
I run, but your grip is too strong… and sleep? She is far gone.
I go to war and I fight, but escape? It is a battle I lose every time.
Send out the messengers and they fall on deaf ears. Can they not hear the screams, or do they simply not care?
And at the end of the day, in the depths of night, when it is just me and you, I know this is something only I can do. I am the one on the front lines. I am the one who has to make it through.
But for just one minute could you give me some reprieve?
Just one minute that’s all I need.
Maybe you could go back under the bed and we could both find some relief.